Feature

Shayera Moula

IT's no myth. Bengalis love food and they pray for gatherings. When the occasion demands a bit of both, let's just say that sometimes things can get a little ugly on the social-manner front. Now there is never an issue when it comes to appreciating some good chats usually loud, sometimes colloquial, and often comical in someone's wedding party. The result however is deafening due to sound pollution, nose-twitching due to combined fragrance of deshi spice, heavy perfume and smelly socks, and visually disturbing thanks to the tug and pull of oily chicken wings by manicured fingers.

'Table manner' is probably something way at the bottom of the social-reform list in our country. Naturally, it's no big deal! But as I venture into how important table manners are, I realize that it actually makes a huge difference in one's first impression anywhere and everywhere meaning, it may not be significant in this country but if you plan to look good elsewhere, you might consider memorizing a few tips.

Time is a factor. Oh I mean in the West, not here! Being late causes mishaps and annoyance and at some point people more or less don't mind toying with the idea of leaving the bill in your name! In Brazil, however, the chilled Latinos don't mind you being late up till 15 minutes. One second passed 15 minutes, they probably start cursing in your name with a smile on their face. Two hours later, they don't remember your name, face or living presence. Forever.

Getting started is pretty easy around here. Food arrives, you ask everyone if it's okay to start eating and that's pretty much that! If you pay a little attention in those heavily spiritual Milads in Bangladesh, you will notice all those who have decided to show up only because of the free food. Once the “specially wrapped box of delicacies” are handed to them, they can't wait to gulp it all down! God bless!

In Japan and Korea it is the other way around. It is really important that you wait until everyone is seated. The elderly starts the meal first and the rest follows. Never overtake them! Remember, this isn't a world record breaking marathon. If you do dig into your food asap, Grandpa Lee might just through in a little prayer for you to be born as a caterpillar in your next life!

Then there is the posture. You clearly don't want to look like you're having a telepathic driven conversation with the vegetables! Do look around a bit. Talk to the other people; compliment the chief through the waiters… give cheers to the fellow mates for the get together. In Venezuela, in a table full of people, it is considered rude to have conversations with one other person only. A “gender-neutral” topic is usually preferred where everyone can chip in their mind as they fill up their tummies. Interesting, I wonder what topics would be involved in this gender neutral get together …hmm... macho-diets, shopping for sports wear ???

Looking first-class while eating is a knotty task. Most of us at home (whether we admit it or not) look like desperate gorillas in some wildfire-fiesta, chewing and gulping and some spilling here and there and no care! In Venezuela, even when having something as simple as soup, it is recommended to dip the spoon into the soup until it is about two-thirds full, then sip the liquid making sure to never put the whole spoon into your mouth. Sound easy? Try doing that keeping in mind that the last time you ate was 6 hours ago and it was just a puny sandwich!

We love eating with our hands and there is actually nothing more fulfilling to the meal if you can't dig those fingers into some home-loving dishes. Try not to swallow your fingers every now and then though. We understand that food is valuable and should not be wasted, but slidding deep in between those fingers pretty much lets us know that you actually haven't had food for the past 6 hours and the last thing you had was indeed a puny sandwich!

Then there are typical rules: Don't chew out loud, eat with your mouth closed, and whip your face clean. And of course, no need to gurgle with water after meal if we want to listen to some heavy metal, we will do it in our own time, thank you very much! No need to pick your teeth either, the rest of us would like to digest our food properly.

Keeping ALL that in mind, I am sure eating is not going to be the same anymore but hey … Bon appetite anyway!